I have a lot of rules. My husband, Bernd, is always telling me this. I can’t argue with him. Over the years, I’ve found he’s usually right in his assessments of me. Dang.
My rules are mainly for me and my behavior. But they do spill over onto other people. That’s usually when Bernd says to me, “You know, you have a lot of rules. Nobody could ever keep track of all your rules.”
One of my rules, as I have discovered, applies to keeping a journal. I figure that if you are going to keep a journal, then you have to write something in it every day. Maybe that something is only that you went to the grocery store and a list of what you bought. Or that you saw a cardinal on your morning walk. Except for today. There was no morning walk. It’s raining and there might not be a late morning walk or the afternoon walk either. We need the rain. Yes, we do. But it makes it hard to get the little Maddie out to pee and poop. She does not like the rain hitting her. I have a coat for her, but the rain hits her coat and she shakes constantly and wants to run back to the front door. But I digress.
So when I started this blog, I felt that I was going to have to post something to it every day because it’s a lot like a journal. At least in my mind. Well, the truth is, I probably cannot come up with something to post every day. So I find myself at war with my expectations of myself. That’s never a winning battle for me.
Ultimately, I don’t really want to use this blog as a journal. That just seems so self-serving and somewhat narcissistic. Maybe that’s not quite the word I’m looking for. I had loftier goals for this blog. Well, maybe not lofty. Practical might be closer to the mark.
I started it because everything I read about independently publishing your books recommended having a blog to get the word out about your books, create and audience for your books, get examples of your writing prowess in front of agents who might possibly become interested in you and your work, and just in general increase your presence on the Internet. It was also advised that you become active on social media. I’m not doing nearly as good a job with the social media. Oh well, can’t be perfect. Although that is another one of my rules. Dang.
The reality is that I find I simply enjoy blogging. I had no idea I would like it as much as I do. And narcissism (or whatever) aside, I am going to try to find time for it every day. But that doesn’t mean that I will. And so somehow, I will have to make peace with at least one of my inner rules. All those others, well I’ve squeaked along more or less okay with them all these years, I guess I will manage one way or another.
Oh goodness! It’s stopped raining for the moment. This will have to wait a while. Look out Maddie, here I come.